1 Samuel 20: Friends First

Jonathan said to David, "Go in peace, for we have sworn friendship with each other in the name of the Lord, saying, "The Lord is witness between you and me, and between your descendants and my descendants forever."

One can sense the force of David's personality by observing the effect he has on people around him. This chapter tells of an undying friendship from David's early days before the tumultuous break with King Saul. The king's son Jonathan values friendship with David so much that he forfeits his chance to accede to the throne.

After Saul reveals his true, murderous intent to Jonathan in a dramatic scene at the dinner table, Jonathan warns David. Thus begins the terrible struggle between the washed-up king and the would-be king. Saul, the king rejected by God, clings to power as he chases David and his band of followers. The events of the next few years mirror the differing inner characters of the two men. Saul, who knows God's will about the rightful king of Israel, spends his life resisting it. David, in contrast, shows amazing patience as he waits for the prophecy to come true without taking matters into his own hands. Caught in the middle, Jonathan sides with his friend David over his father, Saul.

Jealous friends sometimes force us to choose. "Who is your best friend?" they demand, when we'd prefer not to rank them. Jonathan faced that kind of loyalty dilemma with his father, who grew insanely jealous of his son's friendship with David. Insecure and guilt-ridden over past misdeeds, Saul feared that young David would take away his crown. Though Jonathan tried to stay loyal to both father and friend, his father made it impossible. Soon Jonathan realized that Saul would kill David if he caught him. Once, in a blind rage, Saul actually hurled a spear at his own son for standing up for David (20:32-33).

Tragically, the two friends never got the chance to rule together. In a battle against the Philistines, Jonathan fought at his father's side and was killed. David, mourning his dearest friend, sang a poignant song in tribute (2 Samuel 1:17-27). Their loyalty and love make for one of the most beautiful stories of friendship ever told.

Life Question: Do you have a close friendship like David and Jonathan had?

Embarrassingly and shamefully, I'd have to say no. I last thought about this at my son's birthday party when he mentioned to me that a couple of his pre-k buddies had promised each other to be friends forever. An admirable and touching promise, but statistics say that the average friendship last less than 10 years. My life has been marked by various events that have dictated my circle of friends over the years. But, I think that a meaningful friendship with someone has a much better of lasting a lifetime if you can share your faith in Christ with each other.